Sunday, September 21, 2008

Many Blessings Come

It was raised this week that there are more kids coming to the blogosphere. It was opined that we shower the again-moms with loving views of the special happy baby times!

I said in the rapture of my daughter's birthday last week. Our children come to us with nothing. They know us only to love us. Don't let all that pooping, and crying and not-sleeping get in the way of that. Many blessings come to you both, Bec' and Kristen.

I wrote of the closure on infancy at the House of Wo ... Our children are born incomplete in themselves. They are not like the new foal who wobbles about or even the kitten who stumbles with eyes closed. They are born more helpless. Prior to my motherhood I did not appreciate this and I did not appreciate the nourishment a newborn baby gives me. On Tuesday my son passed from newborn to infant and I have left the experience for good. Some might think it odd but I will miss it.

I think of the little babe so dependent on others in those first three months as something precious. It is the trust -- so fleeting in our humanity -- that amazes me. I also think of it, quite selfishly, as my redemption. While a child grows inside me I think they are a part of me. As it happens this does not sharply extinguish for me with birth but instead it dwindles in the flash of time from newborn to infant.

What you need to know about me to understand is that when it comes to me I do not, cannot, always love myself. But this child? It was a part of me, paradox. They arrive, helpless and are unavoidably a piece of me I must love without reservation. I do this wholeheartedly and this redeems me. It seems especially true when they are wee. That is when they are most resonant of what I need to unreservedly love. What am I saying? I should love my pants-crapping/screaming self? Well maybe...


And if you follow the link... you'll see I published it at 1:48 AM. GAME ON!

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1 Comments:

Blogger Subspace Beacon said...

A three month old baby, a toddler AND you were capable of deep thought!? WITH PUNCTUATION!? You do rock.

10:34 PM  

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