Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Colonic

Mo has dreaded the day when I begin to say "I told you so. I told you, I told you Vancouver is no winter town! We should neeever have hosted the winter Olympics." I know this because she has said so three times which therefore qualifies it in the p-books as being said.

But I won't say it, though the heavens rain away all the fake snow, bales of straw, and dry ice that Vanoc trucks onto Cypress Mtn. I will not. Because it could still snow in time for the snowboard savants and their ilk to catch air or hang up, in, or out or whatever it is they are doing between bong hits and coitus. (Not that I have any misconceptions about the sport.) Instead, I will apply the fruit of Onan to my scalp, pout a wee bit (more), and sing it. Yep. Like this guy.



Also on the subject of life's little disappointments and non-sentences, fucking Toyota. We've been driving this mfg. for the last 7 years or so. I have oft said: Ooo, what a reliable motor vehicle we are owning... you should trade in that piece of monkey dung you are driving and get a Toyota. Meanwhile, we kept waiting for the blog endorsement loot to rain upon us like an Olympian golden shower because Toyota is so big they can tell what we are saying to strangers in parking lots who chase us while shouting for no discernible reason, other that our helpful little PSA, and Toyota is sooo very generous to John P. Public that they will pay us mind-control subjects/Toyota owners lots of money in large denominations just for having a Toyota, a big mouth, and an inferiority complex. And by we and us, I mean me. But now it looks like the good times are over. No money for us. And plus also our current flotilla of two is not subject of any recalls. So no class action cashing in. Not that money would help - who is going to compensate me for my loss of smugness?

p-man out

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8:50 PM  

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