Icebreaker, or, A Brief Series of Brief Lists

The other week I went for an ultrasound of my balls and was relieved to discover a: I have balls, and b: the ultrasound jelly was warmed to slightly above body temperature. They are keeping things loose at Mt. St. Joseph's, people, keeping things loose. Good times.

I am having trouble getting through to my 2 year old. Sample a: "It is breakfast time, name, go sit at the table." "I'm not Name, I'm Little Bear." "Whoever you are, it is breakfast time, Ms. Fancy is there already." ""She's not Ms. Fancy, she's Emily. You're Duck." Sample b: "Name, it's time for bed." Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" "Name, it remains time for bed." "I'm not name, I'm Plablo." "Pablo, er, Plablo, it is time for a secret mission. To bed." "I'm little Bear." "...(weeping)..."

I know the world is supposed to be really happy that Barack Obama is the president of the Consolidated Debts of America* but you can mark my words: the fawning millions who love him today will despise him in one year. This is because a: they will discover he is a Vulcan and there is no way America is ready for a Vulcan president, b: the US will still be in Iraq with no withdrawal in sight, c: the economy will still be sucking fumes, and d: still no Chinese democracy. That's the democracy we await.

Another thing: I the depth to my political insight is, hmm, epidermal, so I note this with some caution and the awareness that somebody else will have thought this. The mantra for the victorious campaign was "Yes We Can!" which has a nice positive ring to it. I think Bob the Builder had it first, though. I'm sure I am not the first to observe that candidates will often, um, say things they don't mean in an effort to induce us to vote for them.** But that can change.

Listing,

p-man

* And I am, a little. The odds of the rapture happening at his behest are slightly less than under his opponent.
** I'm sure this time it will be different. Yep.