Saturday, May 01, 2010

Whither the empathy

You know I do have a tendency to obsess that my kids are well-socialized and lovable. We have a good friend who once said, to the great disdain of p-man, she wants her kids to be popular. This is more important to her than being smart.

I know what she means. I have my frustrations with my kids not rocking the free world in their piano or writing skills. I get annoyed when they are picky eaters. It drives me crazy that when they don't obey... But really what pains me.. what slays me is their being spurned, their social failures and the sense of exclusion they experience from time to time.

My Girl Friday was driven to tears this week when she handed over an I Love You picture to a 'friend' at school. The classmate just flatly refused the picture and then topped it off with a comment about her "real friends" who are bigger. I know all the dogma that says small children need a lot of our attention but days like that day make me feel for our bigger kids. When I chat to soon to be back to work moms I do say that there is never a good or a bad time to be stay-at-home. Kids need a lot and always ... but when they are 13 months let's face it you don't really worry who's gonna hurt their feelings. Of late these school days really do get me down.

And, hey, little people ... whither the empathy? If you promise me nothing can we all make the point to our kids this week. If someone gets hurt and is crying; give a damn.. maybe even a hug.

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Blogger nonlineargirl said...

Poor girl, my heart hurts for these slights.

Weird how I see Ada on both sides of this. I've seen her pine for the attention of some older kids, and seen her be not so nice to a sweet younger girl.

8:11 p.m.  

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